Jesus, Im not trying to write a poem.

I was looking through my files this evening and just realized that the school year my notes began was forty years ago.

Forty years ago.

I’m pretty sure I can’t believe I just typed that. I guess if you’re ninety years old and someone’s great-grandma, forty years doesn’t seem like a big deal. But even though I’m only 52, the thought of my 12-year-old self, in middle school, hormones oozing from every pore, is so absurd it almost doesn’t bear thinking about. Maybe I’d feel more in touch with that ‘tween of yesteryear if I had a daughter of my own. Or maybe not.

It took me a bit to decide which note to post today. I finally decided on an anomaly:  this particular note is a poem written by a boy. I’m not exactly sure which boy, as I only have a first name. Nor am I certain of the year it was written–only that it was between 1977-1983. It was written on two pages of Fairfax County Public Schools interoffice memo paper, the subject of which is “Dear Jesus!”

Guys, if you struggle with creative expression, maybe you’ll find some inspiration here.


Its hard to love somebody
Its even harder to let them know
One minute everythings perfect, you think
she really understands
The next, she acts like she dosn’t care
and wants to make other plans.
You try to make her undestand,
that you love the little things like
holding you hand.
It would be so much better and easyer
to sleep, if I knew and was sure
she was mine to keep.
I wish we were the only two
on earth, I wish even more K. L.
could have an earlyer birth.
Its really hard to tell somebody you
want them alone all to your own
God help me, I love that girl to the
bone. I want her to understand
that I love her body, I want to
take tender loving care of it and explain
its not in use. I love every part
like my dad loves the moose.
It hurts so much when she gets
mad. I turn my bluest and it
looks kinda sad. Jesus, Im not
trying to write a poem, Im not
writing this so everybody can
read it Im writing this because
I want to ask you will you
help me find this girl and keep
her forever I can’t make it
without her. Her name is M.C.,
please do me a favor and
let her know shes got the
world if she wants it.
please
I need a miricle if I want to smile
Love your best friend
K.
Babes if your around, I love you to death!

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